Rule #1 on Safari: “Food Runs!” Hilarious And Dangerous Safari Tales!
I have a dream, and it involves going on Safari. I am going to make that dream come true, but when I do, I will remember the first rule:
“Whatever You Do, Don’t Run!”
Alex and I talk all the time about going on safari, something we still have never done. However, before she take one step into the African bush, I’m going to make her read this book!
My “Wednesday Bookmobile” has the rules for a successful trip to Africa!
“Whatever You Do, DON’T RUN!”
True Tales of a Botswana Safari Guide by Peter Allison
Let’s begin with a “safari joke”…
Two guys see a lion. One puts on a pair of running shoes. “what are you doing?” the other guy said, “you can’t outrun a lion.”
“I don’t have to,” the guy replied, “I Only have to outrun YOU.”
It’s a good point: once the Lion has a meal, he will stop attacking…and that’s what makes Africa so fascinating: because it truly is WILD.
I have always wanted to go on an African Safari…and plan to at one point. To satisfy this wanderlust, I read books about safaris, Africa, the entire experience. And “Whatever You Do, Don’t Run” is one of the most entertaining memoirs I’ve read – and it really gives you an idea of what it is like on a Safari…
This book takes you on safari through the eyes of Peter Allison, who backpacked through Africa for six months when he was 19 years old…and never left.
This book look at his life as a Safari tour guide, and includes great anecdotes about such things as:
The Great Mouse Plague” – yes, Africa has more than just hippos and giraffe – when the rains leave lush grasses behind, the mice show up – and since they can produce thousands of babies in just week, the camp was overrun by them!
“A Night In The Madgkadigkadi” – you will never forget this harrowing night when Peter and his group of guide friends find themselves stranded in the “Madgkadigkadi” – one of the most dangerous places to spend a night!
These are great stories, always illuminated with intricate details about the animals of Africa – with facts and insight to help you understand what makes these animals so amazing – and deadly!
Safaris are, in fact, dangerous due to the unpredictability of the animals…as they say:
“The closer you are to the wild, the closer the wild is to you!”
The book tells many stories of “close encounters” with a variety of wild animals – who are not predatory against human so much as just not in the mood to have one in their way!
Oh, the book offers lots of insight about people as well!
You see, apparently going to such an extreme location doesn’t make some people excited about being on a safari. Allison shares numerous tales of bored teens – and bored adults, too!
The Author shares a great anecdote about predatory Lions and how they mark their territory. A battle for supremacy between northern and southern males – over a Lioness – leave our guide and a family of four directly in the path of an epic battle for survival! After experiencing this once-in-a-lifetime lion battle and grassland chase – with Lions charging directly past their truck! – Peter couldn’t stop smiling. But when the family he was guiding got back to camp, the father went to speak to other people, then approached him.
“Those others saw a leopard this morning. And a cheetah.” Peter was about to explain that he had seen one of nature’s most astonishing – and rarely seen – sights when the father followed up with “it looks like you’ve got some catching up to do.”
What nerve! Speaking of nerve, here is a shot of the Author photographing a Leopard UPCLOSE:
“Whatever You Do, Don’t Run” is a great primer for anyone interested in going on safari, and it has only made me more determined to get there…
And Allison has published a sequel, called of course:
“Don’t Look Behind You!”
I can’t wait to read this next!
If heading to Africa is more than you can manage right now, once the pandemic lifts, why not head to Malibu California instead?
Meet Stanley – The Wine Giraffe!
That’s right! In the mountains above Malibu is a “Wine Safari” and it’s incredible!
You can meet Stanley and many more exotic animals, and have some great wine as well!
Click here to see the adventure!
Of course, there’s only one place I really want to go to meet friendly Giraffes:
Yes, a Hotel where the Giraffes join your for breakfast!
Click here for more details on this magical adventure:
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